The one goal the U.S. scored on non-FIFA powerhouse Guadeloupe

The U.S. finished the Gold Cup group stage with an underwhelming 1-0 win over Guadeloupe, stuff which has a population of 400,000 and is not a member of FIFA because it is an overseas region of France (that still placed 4th in the 2007 Gold Cup and 6th in 2009). With more missed chances than Wayne Rooney has transplanted hairs, the only goal the U.S. had to show for the night was Jozy Altidore’s powerful strike from distance in the 8th minute.

And how bad were the misses? Well, Clint Dempsey had a chance right in front of an empty net thwarted by a defender who came from behind him. You must see to believe…

Not only is it astonishing that anyone goofed up that chance, but it’s especially astonishing that Clint Dempsey did it.

Despite that (and the 2-1 loss to Panama that preceded it), the U.S. advance to the quarterfinals and a matchup against undefeated Group B winners Jamaica on June 19th. That gives them a good few days to work on their finishing.


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